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Disclaimer: Everything within this review is the honest to god truth. Really. We couldn't make up a day like this.
Disclaimer #2: For those who have never read anything I write, I ramble. A lot. Be warned.
And, finally, a note: More pics to come when we get Steph's and Kelly's ... stay tuned!
- DivaGypsy (the Author Diva)
***
The Diva Diaries, part 1 - Information
Gathering
Friday, October 8, 1999
Finally. After nearly two months of waiting,
the day is here. The BSB are
in town. Whoo hoo, serious freaking party
time.
Three Divas (Kel, Jen, and Steph) have the afternoon
off of work, while the
fourth (Jaime -- yours truly) was stuck in the
office on this gorgeous fall
afternoon. However, the three with free
time have decided to put it to
good use by scoping out hotels. After an
afternoon of driving around and
around the streets of downtown Minneapolis, there
are two confirmed bus
sightings. At the Hilton, five large tour
buses with Florida plates sit
outside. At the Crown Plaza, one lone tour
bus with California plates
sits. To the untrained detective, the Hilton
would look like the best bet.
Florida plates must equal the BSB, right?
Not necessarily ... Kel, the
world-travelling Diva, had found out in Charlotte
that Nick now rides a bus
with California plates, the very same one parked
out on 7th Street. So,
the Crown Plaza it was.
We had a room booked at the Crown Plaza for Saturday
night, so after I
joined the group on Friday evening, we went over
to schmooze with the staff
and gather information. Carl, the bellhop,
is a font of information. He
tells us that he thinks two Boys are already
there -- the tall blonde one
and maybe a short, dark-haired one -- and that
the other Boys are flying in
on Saturday. We'd already figured out that
Nick was there, but as for the
other one, we assume Howie is there as well.
Carl also tells us that those
already there are staying on the 11th floor.
Okay, cool ... we go upstairs
to the front desk, where we proceed to tell the
front desk clerks that we
have reservations for Saturday, but a friend
of ours has checked in and is
staying on the 11th floor -- is there any way
we can get a room there, as
well? The nice ladies there check, but
finally tell us that we'll have to
check it out in the morning when we check in.
We can do that.
Back downstairs to the entrance, where we meet
Rueben, the limo driver.
Kel and I had met Rueben briefly before, when
'N Sync was in town. He
tells us that he drove "the blonde one and the
short one" to the Mall of
America earlier in the day to go shopping.
He then proceeds to regale us
with tales of celebrities he's driven (Ice Cube
is cool, but Michael
Richards, Jon Secada, and our gov, Jesse Ventura,
are jerks), and attempts
to set Steph up with his son, Tony. Finally,
he invites us to a party at
First Avenue with the band Afro Celt. We
decide to go to TGI Fridays for
dinner instead. (Ironically, we ended up
at a table next to some people
with Afro Celt. Small world.)
It ends up being a quiet evening. We go
back to the Crown Plaza and stake
out the bar for a while -- once again, the super
nice CP employees show
their faces, when the bartender steals us some
of the party mix from the
wedding reception next door. There's no
action going on, though, other
than the wedding and a bunch of drunk Wisconsin
Badger fans, in town for
the Badger/Gopher football game Saturday.
We decide to turn in early.
After all, Saturday is hopefully going to be
a very long, very productive
day ....
***
The Diva Diaries, part 2 - Such Maturity!
Saturday, October 9, 1999
We check into the Crown Plaza around noon. The
nice people at the front
desk have graciously found us a room on the 11th
floor. Rock on! We even
see Nick's bodyguard, Billy, wandering our floor.
There is no action for most of the afternoon.
We're not sure if the rest
of the Boys have snuck in from the parking ramp,
or if they're not there
yet, or what. We begin to get anxious,
and thus, start to relieve our
tension in strange ways. Mid afternoon,
the football fans start wandering
back, drunk off their asses and cheering the
Badgers' victory in overtime.
Kel tries to take the beer away from one guy,
and ends up chasing him
around the sidewalk for a few minutes.
Steph and I go over to give a bag
of candy to Billy, who is patrolling the outside
of the hotel -- he's very
happy, and scarfs it down. Later, Steph
and I wander back up to our hotel
room, bored. Steph leans out the window
to see Kel and Jen standing below.
She takes the bowl of mints the hotel provided
us and begins to drop them
out the window, trying to hit them in the head.
However, the wind keeps
carrying them too far over. A couple of
pieces end up on the roof of
Nick's bus. Whoops.
Finally, at around 3:15, the band bus pulls up.
The first one off is Tommy
-- he's growing his hair out. I didn't
realize he was a blonde. Then, we
meet Guy ... he decides he likes Steph's leopard
print shirt, and wants to
try it on. Kel showed Guy the 'fish shake'
(if you don't know, it has to
be demonstrated, not described), which he proclaimed
as 'gross'. Dennis
arrives, and is, as usual, a character.
Dennis is another phenomenon that
cannot be described. Later on, when the
band comes back out to go to the
show, he decides to show us his new trophy from
Chicago. He comes back out
and displays a large wooden fish, which Kel immediately
recognizes.
Apparently, this comes from a famous display
in Chicago, Cows on Parade --
this fish is on a platter, and was apparently
being served by a cow. Not anymore.
Dennis stole it. He's very proud of himself,
and even poses for a picture with his catch.
Then, he poses for a pick as Steph gets down
on one knee and presents him with fake
flowers. He also poses for a pic groping
Steph. Yep, Dennis is definitely camera shy.
Apparently, bellhop Carl has been replaced as
Steph's boyfriend.
Dennis and his fish
Dennis and the Divas -- from left, Steph, Kel, Dennis,
Jen, and Jaime
We also finally meet Mindi. We decide as
a group to make her an honorary
Diva -- after all, any woman who has to spend
all her time with a bunch of
men (especially *this* bunch) has got to be a
Diva. We present her with
Jen's Diva key chain, which she thinks is cooler
than anything. She says
she's going to show it to the rest of the band,
just to remind them who she
is.
After the band disappears, we are alone again.
No Boys sightings ... yet.
That is about to change.
***
The Diva Diaries, part 3 -- Close
Encounters of the Diva Kind
The band disappears, and we're left with the rest of the groupies.
We're
getting a little antsy. When are these idiots going to show up, anyway?
Finally, though, another large black bus pulls up. Aha!
Here we go! I'm
suddenly glad I didn't eat any lunch, because my stomach is jumping
into my
throat.
The first one off the bus is Brian. He's wearing some kind of
funny hat --
it has wings, like some kind of Russian hat. He's definitely
not in the
mood to stop ... he just half smiles and waves at everyone as security
rushes him inside.
Next off is AJ. (Okay, Jaime, breathe in, breathe out, that's
a good
girl.) He's very accommodating, stopping to take a couple of
pics and give
out a couple of hugs. Steph has a goodie bag to give him ...
I follow her,
hanging back, unable to make myself get any closer. DAMN, does
he look
good in person. I mean, completely freaking gorgeous. Steph
works her way
up to the front and gets his attention. He thinks the candy is
pretty cool
when she hands it to him. Still, I hang in back of her, staring.
Damn my
introversion, anyway. He disappears inside, and I mentally kick
myself.
What the hell was I doing? Who the hell knows if I'll get another
chance
at that?
Soon after he's inside, Howie comes out. (Hey, wait, we thought
he was
already there? Guess not. Carl must have been wrong.)
He didn't stop for
anyone, but smiled nicely and waved as he walked by.
So, Nick's already there ... that just leaves Kevin. We wait.
We wait
some more. Then, the bus pulls away. Wait, you forgot someone!
No Kevin.
Jen's highly pissed. After all, Kel, Steph and I got to see *our*
men.
It's just not fair.
Steph goes upstairs first ... she runs into Nick's friend Brent in the
hallway. Inspired, she gives him the goodie bag meant for Nick.
Brent says
that he'll give it to him. (We just hope that he didn't decide
to eat it
himself!)
Eventually, the rest of us head upstairs to get ready for the show.
Maybe
we'll catch them again as they leave ....
5:30 PM
Steph's friend Kelly has joined us. (To avoid future confusion,
DivaChickie is always known as Kel, and Steph's friend is Kelly.)
The five
of us are upstairs getting all dressed up for the concert. We're
in
various stages of preparation when someone looks out the window and
sees
the security guards back downstairs. The guys must be coming
back out.
Time to race for the elevators ... I have no makeup on, and Kel is
in her
socks. We don't care. Dammit, we are going to meet the
guys.
[Insert from Kel: I also thought it was funny when we came off
the elevator
and I said, very loudly, "I can't believe I'm going out there
in my socks."
Then one of the security guys, I think it was Carlos, turned and said,
"Hey,
nice socks!" The other two security dudes with him turned and
looked at
my feet, one of them laughing. I told Carlos, "Yeah, they're
on sale at Target!"
He gave me the thumbs up. Very amusing. For some reason,
that sticks in my mind.
Vividly.]
Back outside. AJ is the first one out. He's wearing a black
vest with a
sleeveless shirt underneath. Oh my f***ing god. He once
again stops to
talk to everyone ... I feel myself being shoved by several hands from
the
back. "Get up there!" Finally, I'm up front and I catch
his attention. I
actually manage to string together a few coherent thoughts. We
take the
picture, and I hug him and tell him "thank you." He says "You're
welcome,
sweetheart." Okay, so he was calling everyone sweetheart, but
still ...
thud. Jen and Kel are next in line for pics ... as usual, they
manage to
come up with the best lines. Kel tells him that he rocks.
She asks for and
receives a hug .. he tells her to have fun at the show.
Jen says "you
da man!", to which he replies "I'm tryin'." Kelly also gets her
pic with
AJ. Meanwhile, I'm off to the side, reminding myself to breathe.
Jaime & AJ
Jen, AJ, & Kel
Howie is out next. Steph freaks. He's wearing a gray sweat
suit ... this
time, he stops to take pictures. Kel also tells him "you da man!"
His
response -- "That's right, baby." Kel has a THUD moment.
Steph finally
gets her picture with him. She actually kind of invades his personal
space, but then backs off and lets him have a little breathing room.
When
it's all over, she's a wreck. Hell, I was very nearly a wreck,
still, from
AJ. She, Kelly and I go back to the back of the crowd and hang
on each
other for a moment.
[insert from Steph: He put his hand out to mine to gently guide
me to his side.
I took his hand and firmly placed myself almost on top of the poor
guy. I kind
of gave him a mini hug and had my face right next to his. then
I started to feel like a
complete lunatic and said...yikes I am kinda close...kind of all in
your
space. then his jerky bodyguard said ..that's right...but Howie
sure didn't
seem to mind...I just felt like an ass.]
Brian comes out next. He only stops for a couple of people, then
hurries
back onto the bus. He looks like he's not having a good day.
No Kevin. Rumor has it he slept on the bus all day. Damn.
No Nick. Another rumor says he's been on *his* bus all day, playing
Nintendo. We missed whenever he came out. Double damn.
Oh, well. The bus pulls away, and we head back to the room to
finish
getting ready. It's concert time, baby!!
***
The Diva Diaries, part 4 -- "
... I led you here, for I ... am ... Spartacus"
At the Target Center, you can almost taste the excitement in the air.
We
get to our kickass seats -- seventh row, baby! -- and await the beginning
of the show. Sitting in the row in front of us is a woman and
three
teenage girls ... we strike up a casual conversation with them.
The
conversation turns rather Diva-ish as Mandy Moore takes the stage.
I'm
sure she's a lovely girl, but she can't lip synch worth a damn.
I know,
we're horrible, but we spend our time making fun of her.
EYC takes the stage. Holy shit, who let JC Chasez, Joey Lawrence,
and the
remaining guy from Milli Vanilli form a new group? They weren't
lip
synching, but they should have been. At one point, one of them
yells "Minnesota,
we have a question for you all!" Steph's answer -- "Yeah, you suck!!"
And, guys,
I'm sorry, but I didn't pay $40 to see YOUR chests. Get off the
damn stage already.
We're in the middle of EYC's set, cheerfully trashing them with our
new
friends in front of us, when a Target Center employee comes down the
aisle.
He taps the woman in front of us on the shoulder, and gives her
a "come
with me" gesture. She and her girls stand up and begin to walk,
when
suddenly, she turns around and waves at us. "Come on!" she yells.
We look
at each other, confused, but follow her.
We're led around corners, into an elevator, and down into an unrecognizable
part of the arena. It takes us a few minutes, but slowly, the
four of us
realize that we're backstage. I mean, actually, really, and truly
backstage. Let the silent freaking out begin. We are led
to a VIP lounge
... candlelight, beer, snacks, the whole nine yards. How the
HELL did we
end up here? Finally, it dawns on us when the woman we'd been
following
introduces herself to another TC employee. "Hi, I'm Lynda McCombs."
We've
just befriended the daughter of the owner of the Minnesota Vikings.
Holy
shit. She explains that the Target Center had been expecting
a party of
eight, but only four of them came to the show. As they got up
to leave,
she just up and decided to invite the four of us along, too.
Hello, where
has this luck been all my life?!?!?!?
So, there we are, in a VIP lounge backstage, apparently waiting for
a meet
& greet with the Boys. Let the AUDIBLE freaking out begin.
"How did we
get here?" we keep asking each other. (The usual answer to that
is the
title of this little chapter. Brownie points for anyone who names
the
movie.)
There's only one other group in our lounge -- a teenage girl and her
entourage. We strike up a conversation with this girl ... she's
very
entertaining. In the middle of our conversation, Lynda leans
over to us.
"Do you know who that girl is?" she asks. Uh-uh, no, we don't.
"That's
Jade Ventura." As in, the daughter of our infamous wrestler/governor,
Jesse. Are we hobnobbing with the important people, or what??
The Divas with the gov's daughter. She's the one in the white.
Eventually, we're led outside to have our pictures taken with the guys.
They're running late, so no autographs or individual pictures.
We don't
care. The Boys are dressed in their blue "Larger Than Life" costumes
...
when we get up there, Jen makes a beeline for Kevin. Finally,
she gets the
chance to meet her man. I wander over to the other end, where
Nick and
Howie are standing. Quite honestly, I don't remember what the
hell we
talked about. All I know is that Howie was very animated, and
Nick was
really funny. Brian was on our side, too, but he was quiet ...
he made one
of his patented funny faces, though, when Howie told him to kneel down
in
front. Over on the other side, Steph is kneeling down with AJ.
Actually,
I believe that the exact quote from AJ was "Go down with me."
Oh, yeah,
like THAT'S not going to be interpreted six ways from Sunday in present
company. Damn, why couldn't I have been on that side -- I'd kill
to have
him say that to me, in whatever context.
So, we take the picture, shake hands with everyone and say 'thank you',
and
dash back out to our seats. As soon as we were out of earshot,
we began
shrieking like 13 year olds. Wouldn't you???
part 5 ... the concert review ... coming soon. You see, Jaime
was kind of in shock through most of the show, so she needs her fellow
Divas to help her out. As soon as we're organized (snort), we'll
get the review up. Promise!
