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As predicted, AJ was sitting in front of the window, sucking on
a
Marlboro Light, when I returned to the room. I pretended to cough.
“Isn’t
this supposed to be a non smoking room?”
“Yeah, well, sometimes fame has its privileges.” He turned
around.
“Feel better?”
“Well, yeah, kind of. Met up with Nick when I was down there.
He’s a nice guy.”
“He has his moments, I guess.”
I sat in the chair opposite him. “I’m sorry for running
out like that.
Steve just kind of caught me by surprise.”
“Are you going to call him back?”
The look in AJ’s eyes was intense ... I couldn’t quite read it.
I
looked out the window. “I don’t know. Probably. Just
to see what he says.
You know, I was thinking about it, and he didn’t even apologize in
that
message. He just went straight to blaming me for running away.
That’s
pretty typical.”
“He’s an ass. You shouldn’t even acknowledge him.”
“Maybe, maybe not. If I call him back, he might make me
feel two
feet tall, like he usually does. Then again, I might drive myself mad
wondering how he’s going to explain everything. It might be better
just to
know, you know?”
“So, what happens if he apologizes all nice, huh?” AJ leaned
forward. “Says all the pretty words, says he loves you, can’t
live without
you ... what then?”
“What? I don’t know ... that’s not his style, anyway.
He’d never say
that stuff.”
“But what if he does? Would you go running back to him?”
Would I? It was something I hadn’t thought about.
I looked at AJ
in confusion. “No ... I don’t think so ... I can’t imagine it
...”
“You don’t think so.” AJ crushed his cigarette out and stared
out
the window.
I was lost. “What’s with you?”
“With me? Oh, nothing ... it’s just that, an hour ago, I
was making
love to you, pouring my heart out to you. Now, your ex calls
up, and I can
see it in your eyes ... you’re considering him again.”
“Excuse me? Considering him? Not hardly. I was
with him for
three years ... I’m not going to apologize for still having some kind
of
feelings for him.”
“What about me?”
“Huh?”
“What about your feelings for me?”
“I’ve known you for less than a week, AJ -- I haven’t figured
out my
feelings for you yet. You make me feel all sorts of things I
haven’t felt
before. I don’t know what to do with them.”
He stood up and began to walk away, then turned, leaning over
and
putting his hands on the arms of my chair. “I asked you to come
with me.
I’m asking you again -- call him back, tell him to go to hell, and
come to
California with me. When we make it to Kansas City next month,
he won’t
even recognize you. You’ll be able to laugh in his face.”
AJ’s face was inches from mine. There was a desperation
there that
made my heart ache. “Why do you want me to come so bad, AJ?”
I asked
softly. “What’s so wrong with this life that you don’t want to
be alone?”
He stepped back. “I just want you here, Tori. Is that so wrong?”
“No ... but there’s gotta be something going on. What is it?”
“Nothing!” he growled. “Dammit ... I’m going to bed.
It’s late, and
we have a show tomorrow. Just think about it.”
“About what? Steve? Coming with you? What?”
“Everything.”
With that, he stalked into the bathroom, leaving me confused and
alone. And just a little bit scared.
